Ramsey
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Shreveport, LA
I bet you make her proud. Letting her act that way? Wtf is wrong with you? I have no respect for people that dont respect their own mother.jpars said:
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errr - 2
- Thread starter CommandoXJ96
- Start date
jpars
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Portland OR
Not about not respecting them- its about not letting them 1000% run your life. I have a few friends that sat in their basements for 4 years because they never got the balls to say that no, this time, they were staying out until midnight. And its pathetic.
Its about compromises, if this was happening to me i would have flipped out and started yelling at people. And yeah, if my mom knew exactly where i was with days of planning and called everyone when i didnt call her on the nose at an exact time, I would freak out.
Its about compromises, if this was happening to me i would have flipped out and started yelling at people. And yeah, if my mom knew exactly where i was with days of planning and called everyone when i didnt call her on the nose at an exact time, I would freak out.
jpars
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Portland OR
and explain to me how the girl is in trouble? im failing to grasp that part of the story......
did she not tell her parents she was going to go wheeling?
is she not supposed to go wheeling?
why would she not be able to talk to you.
it all just doesnt add up to me.
did she not tell her parents she was going to go wheeling?
is she not supposed to go wheeling?
why would she not be able to talk to you.
it all just doesnt add up to me.
CommandoXJ96
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Tucson
it doesnt add up to me either. she told her mom she was going wheeling too - and her mom was kul with it too... Her moms pissed at me too for some reason - it makes no sense to me at all why though. And I do try to respect my mom. She makes no sense to me most of the time but shes still my mom after all. Well I'm glad none of this makes sense to you guys to either - at least I know I'm not the ones whose crazy.
Beej
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- The Wet Coast of BC
I would literally plant my foot up my son's ass if he followed your advice...jpars said:
A man needs to carve his lot in life and stand by it. Respect everyone until they lose your respect. Treat others exactly as you wish to be treated no matter who they are or what they've done. Put yourself in another's shoes before you judge them...
Ramsey
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Shreveport, LA
Careful, craziness is genetic. Both my parents are nuts, and sadly I'm right there with them.
CommandoXJ96
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Tucson
Ramsey said:
well thats not good.
shortxjdoug
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Chattanooga tn
jpars said:
i went through high school being the envy of all because me and my mom had a respect for each other..... by not being in idiot kid she trusted me and allowed me a freedom that not many teenagers i know could dream of, when she asked what i was doing i was totally straight with her and never had to lie, and still had "fun" doing things and being places that some parents would flip about, and in turn whenever she really needed me to do something there was never any complaining..... not giving a shit now or then may work for the short term "fun" but down the road one day when you wish mom was there you may regret it
jpars
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Portland OR
ok i could have used more discretion when wording my comment. me and my parents are on extremely good terms- and i have deep respect for them. but there did come a point where i started to push boundaries. i am very reasonable and had no problem admitting when i f***ed up, however i was also not as stupid as many kids. never drank and drive, never vandalized, etc. I think that if you asked my mom if me pushing the boundaries gradually was a good thing she would agree to. Because in actuality it just furthered the "respect" by allowing me more freedom- granted i continue to be smart.
if that makes sense
maybe its just that im the same age as you but, i dont get it. not like "its unfair i dont get it", like, i actually mentally do not understand.
so you told them you were going wheeling and went
what is the problem?
especially with the girl. is she just pissed because she cant wheel for crap and needs to learn some auto maintenece or what?
like im failing to comprehend why there is conflict, or even what the conflict is...?
if that makes sense
CommandoXJ96 said:
maybe its just that im the same age as you but, i dont get it. not like "its unfair i dont get it", like, i actually mentally do not understand.
so you told them you were going wheeling and went
what is the problem?
especially with the girl. is she just pissed because she cant wheel for crap and needs to learn some auto maintenece or what?
like im failing to comprehend why there is conflict, or even what the conflict is...?
shortxjdoug
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Chattanooga tn
i fail to see why this toyota girl not talking to you is such a big deal, sounds like it wasn't all happy and good before so why do you care? Stick with the friends who stick with you and screw the rest, really worked out well for me 
Ramsey
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Shreveport, LA
good advice, but hes just trying to get his fingers wetshortxjdoug said:i fail to see why this toyota girl not talking to you is such a big deal, sounds like it wasn't all happy and good before so why do you care? Stick with the friends who stick with you and screw the rest, really worked out well for me
jml1911a1
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Chambersburg, PA
Dear CommandoXJ98:
Chicks are not men with less hair, weird plumbing, interesting curvature, and softer, smoother fun parts.
They are a different species.
Let's say there's a problem: You, a man, say, "How can we fix this?" A woman says, "This is really inconvenient. Who can I convey my distaste of the situation to?"
Women feel. Their view of the world is filtered through emotion. This is not an absolute, as anecdotal evidence will surely show.
Men think. They use logic and reason to solve problems and evalute situations. This, too, is not an absolute, but is largely true.
Good luck. How old are you? I can understand the inconvenience of your mother being a naggy psycho, but if you're living in her house, you're kindof up the proverbial creek, aren't you? Female peers, on the other hand, can be dealt with in other ways. A good, firm, "OK, you're being a pain in the butt. Go away, and come back when you can be pleasant and reasonable." This may likely get you a loud tirade, at which time you simply walk away or ignore her, or just calmly ask her if she needs a firm spanking, as she's acting like a spoiled five-year old just denied candy.
Educational links, not politically correct:
http://www.themenscenter.com/busterb/index.htm
http://www.john-ross.net/advice.htm
http://www.john-ross.net/abby.htm
http://www.voxday.net/archive/2004/041904.html
http://www.voxday.net/archive/2004/020904.html
That's a good start. I've learned more about the opposite sex from those sites than anything else.
Bottom line: Don't take their crap. It's not easy, but it works. (I'm referring to your peers, not your mother. Respect your mother, though perhaps you must respect her from your own place somewhere, with Caller ID and a handy peep-hole in the door.)
(OK, bring on the "I'm offended by that misogynistic comment!" and the "How dare you say that women are different than men!" responses...)
Chicks are not men with less hair, weird plumbing, interesting curvature, and softer, smoother fun parts.
They are a different species.
Let's say there's a problem: You, a man, say, "How can we fix this?" A woman says, "This is really inconvenient. Who can I convey my distaste of the situation to?"
Women feel. Their view of the world is filtered through emotion. This is not an absolute, as anecdotal evidence will surely show.
Men think. They use logic and reason to solve problems and evalute situations. This, too, is not an absolute, but is largely true.
Good luck. How old are you? I can understand the inconvenience of your mother being a naggy psycho, but if you're living in her house, you're kindof up the proverbial creek, aren't you? Female peers, on the other hand, can be dealt with in other ways. A good, firm, "OK, you're being a pain in the butt. Go away, and come back when you can be pleasant and reasonable." This may likely get you a loud tirade, at which time you simply walk away or ignore her, or just calmly ask her if she needs a firm spanking, as she's acting like a spoiled five-year old just denied candy.
Educational links, not politically correct:
http://www.themenscenter.com/busterb/index.htm
http://www.john-ross.net/advice.htm
http://www.john-ross.net/abby.htm
http://www.voxday.net/archive/2004/041904.html
http://www.voxday.net/archive/2004/020904.html
That's a good start. I've learned more about the opposite sex from those sites than anything else.
Bottom line: Don't take their crap. It's not easy, but it works. (I'm referring to your peers, not your mother. Respect your mother, though perhaps you must respect her from your own place somewhere, with Caller ID and a handy peep-hole in the door.)
(OK, bring on the "I'm offended by that misogynistic comment!" and the "How dare you say that women are different than men!" responses...)
CanMan
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Lake Tapps, WA
ECKSJAY said:
Well put DR. Phil.
THIS THREAD IS WORTHLESS WITHOUT PIX OF YOUR MOM, SO WE CAN DETERMINE IF SHE IS A MILF OR NOT.
CommandoXJ96
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Tucson
shortxjdoug - i think you have a good point. Ramsey... funny , but not accurate to my situation. lol. well... im fine with not talking to my friend; if thats all i gotta do to piss her off (well... nothing really) then thats about what the friendship is worth to me too - nothing. i think its bs. I'm not so much mad at my mother anymore - nor am I gonna argue with her about anything - becuase even my mother has let this thing go already. Thats hard for her to do; and my friends still pissy. That ain't right and now that I think about it... I shouldnt be talking to my friend the ways shes been acting - not the other way around.
CommandoXJ96
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Tucson
all my friends agree - my mother is NOT a milf. just Google search the term damnit.
Ramsey
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Shreveport, LA
So this female was just a friend? How the hell can you be friends with a woman, and not try anythign, unless she was just absolutely hideous.
Matthew Currie
NAXJA Member #760
- Location
- Vermont, land of big clay
I think Beej has it about right, but I also suspect that there's been trouble brewing of one sort or another for a long time, and if you want the trouble to end, you need to find ways of dealing with your mom that do not make it worse. Of course if you're really at fault, you'll know it, and I won't, but let's assume for the moment you're not really some kind of ireesponsible parent-baiting punk. It sounds more as if your mother is a bith quick on the trigger, and perhaps overly concerned. You need to make sure that she understands what you're doing, and you need to give her some reason to trust that you're not going to get into trouble. Dumping the ditzy toyota girl is probably a good first step.
So: if she forgot or did not understand what you were planning to do, then either you did not explain it adequately or she did not understand what should have been an adequate explanation. If the first, make sure you explain better. Don't just say, hey I'm gonna go wheelin with a friend, unless you're entirely sure that she understands that this means, hey, I plan to go off roading with a friend in the woods, and I might get stuck, don't worry, but I might be late, etc. etc. out of cell phone range, so don't expect me back before.....etc etc. but don't worry, we're prepared. And then make sure you really are prepared.
If the communication problem is hers, as I suspect it might be, because she sounds kind of ...dramatic....then leave a note. A prominent, well articulated note at an agreed upon place, which she cannot say she did not understand. Time out, time back, approximately where going, with whom, etc. etc. ad nauseam.
So: if she forgot or did not understand what you were planning to do, then either you did not explain it adequately or she did not understand what should have been an adequate explanation. If the first, make sure you explain better. Don't just say, hey I'm gonna go wheelin with a friend, unless you're entirely sure that she understands that this means, hey, I plan to go off roading with a friend in the woods, and I might get stuck, don't worry, but I might be late, etc. etc. out of cell phone range, so don't expect me back before.....etc etc. but don't worry, we're prepared. And then make sure you really are prepared.
If the communication problem is hers, as I suspect it might be, because she sounds kind of ...dramatic....then leave a note. A prominent, well articulated note at an agreed upon place, which she cannot say she did not understand. Time out, time back, approximately where going, with whom, etc. etc. ad nauseam.
CommandoXJ96
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Tucson
Matthew Currie said:
i talked with my Dad a couple hours ago about going up on Tuesday (with just my guy friends) and I wrote a note for them just in case. and yeah - i had a crush on this girl like way back in last October, but its been a thing of the past for me for a while - a long while.
- Location
- Harrisburg, NC
jpars said:
Interesting theory. I'm also 18 and have a theory exactly opposite of yours. Yeah my mom can be a royal pain in the ass, and we do get into our arguements, but they're all like that. And someday....some very distant day, you'll thank her. Trust me, i've thought about some of the stuff my mom has said over the years that I at first thought "ahhh she's full of it" and now I think, ya know, she was right.
So when you say that she was "pwning his shitz0r" in reality she was really being a mom. You just gotta get used to the mother instinct...they're always gonna worry, even when you move out. And as long as you're under her roof you go by her rules.
You know when I really started having a good time in high school, when the girls would come up to me and say they think it's really cool that I'm very mature for my age....alot of people i've met over the years have said that.
You may be "cool" now cause you're a "bad ass", but like shortxjdoug, I too get alot of respect from my friends for the way I treat my mom....both my parents for that matter. Yeah you may call me stupid or an ass or whatever other word pops into your head, but i've got nothing but respect for the people who brought me into this world and taught me what I know.
CanMan
NAXJA Forum User
- Location
- Lake Tapps, WA
jpars said:
Like so? :dunno:
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