Legal assistance for a divorce from a violent relationship?

[AIbandit]

I'm trying to find legal assistance for my mother inlaw. Her husband threatens to kill her removed her from their bank account and got a lawyer to try to take her land which is literally all she has. All of my googling had just led from links to links.

I'd help but myself and my fiance' both lost our jobs.


Thanks.

 

[Tom R.]

The "legal assistance" comes in the form of a lawyer. If she can't afford one, then you might want to start by contacting the city she lives in for a referral.

 

[n1ywb]

Seriously, start with the police, then get a restraining order, that's easy and free and will slow him down a bit. Then get some legal help, try a civic group or a battered woman's foundation or something. In Vermont we have http://www.whbw.org/

If you guys are both unemployed you can probably put a lot of time into legal work and make this guy's life a living hell.

 

[n1ywb]

You know your an XJ owner when you turn to forums in your time of need! :confused1

 

[AIbandit]

The "legal assistance" comes in the form of a lawyer. If she can't afford one, then you might want to start by contacting the city she lives in for a referral.

I've been trying to contact the court facilitator in her city but they don't answer their phone. I read online they can give referrals. Is that who you're talking about

 

[AIbandit]

You know your an XJ owner when you turn to forums in your time of need! :confused1

I know there's a lot of good people with a wide range of experiences in life. Who better to ask?

 

[AIbandit]

Seriously, start with the police, then get a restraining order, that's easy and free and will slow him down a bit. Then get some legal help, try a civic group or a battered woman's foundation or something. In Vermont we have http://www.whbw.org/

If you guys are both unemployed you can probably put a lot of time into legal work and make this guy's life a living hell.

I'll try to find some programs but she's less than 10 miles from the northern CA border literally in the middle of no where. Thank you

 

[AIbandit]

Yup nothing up there, I just spoke with the battered women's shelter there. They said the cheapest lawyer is 3.5k none do pro-bono. There are no assistance programs aside from a "divorce workshop".

Sucks being rural in So-cal there are a ton of volunteer lawyer programs.

 

[n1ywb]

Well like I suggested, show up with your mom the next minute Family court is open and have her ask the judge for a restraining order. They usually grant them and after the dude gets served he'll be on auto-arrest if he comes within 500 feet of her, which would hopefully allow her defacto possession of the house at least until he gets his day in family court. Family court is like small claims, you just show up and lay it all on the judge, who sees stuff like this all the time. Lawyers aren't required. Make sure she tells the judge that to feel safe from him SHE needs to live in that house and he needs to go somewhere else until this is resolved. If you're worried about him coming back, stay in the house with her, armed if necessary. Possession is 9/10 of ownership, right? Again that should buy you time.

Then go to the town or county or whatever and talk about the land issue. The town handles deeds, right? So they should have the power to block the change to the title, if one's even been made.

Then go to the bank and be like "yo whattUP?!" No seriously, kill 'em with kindness, but if they don't cooperate, threaten them with legal action.

Some well written letters might help.

If it's a lot of assets, the land and house, spending 3.5k would suck, but look at it as an investment. And most lawyers offer payment plans. And if you win, you can sue him for the lawyer fees, if he can afford to pay them...

 

[n1ywb]

I hate to say it but you could also try compromising with the guy, maybe he'd agree to binding arbitration or something? That's much less expensive than a lawyer.

 

[AIbandit]

Well like I suggested, show up with your mom the next minute Family court is open and have her ask the judge for a restraining order. They usually grant them and after the dude gets served he'll be on auto-arrest if he comes within 500 feet of her, which would hopefully allow her defacto possession of the house at least until he gets his day in family court. Family court is like small claims, you just show up and lay it all on the judge, who sees stuff like this all the time. Lawyers aren't required. Make sure she tells the judge that to feel safe from him SHE needs to live in that house and he needs to go somewhere else until this is resolved. If you're worried about him coming back, stay in the house with her, armed if necessary. Possession is 9/10 of ownership, right? Again that should buy you time.

Then go to the town or county or whatever and talk about the land issue. The town handles deeds, right? So they should have the power to block the change to the title, if one's even been made.

Then go to the bank and be like "yo whattUP?!" No seriously, kill 'em with kindness, but if they don't cooperate, threaten them with legal action.

Some well written letters might help.

If it's a lot of assets, the land and house, spending 3.5k would suck, but look at it as an investment. And most lawyers offer payment plans. And if you win, you can sue him for the lawyer fees, if he can afford to pay them...

The property is in her name but the court considers it "community property" because he's lived there since april of this year.

She has a restraining order they took "all" of his guns from him but she said she just went to the house and found one with boxes of ammo hidden outside along with a few inside. I told her to call the sheriff to come get them before he comes to get his stuff tomorrow.

It's not that the 3.5k wouldn't be worth it it's just no one has the money. Honestly I think her only hope is if the judge actually listens to what the letters say.

 

[ocean_jet]

I agree. Get the restraining order right away. Then have her file for disolution of the marriage.


Once she files, there will be immediate court orders in there restricting him from disposing of community assets. If he ignores the court orders, he can face criminal charges.


She needs to file for disolution to get the court to stop him from messing with their assets. He can use the marital assets however he sees fit UNTIL she files. Once she files, he can no longer mess with their money or other assets.

She needs to do this IMMEIDATELY. Today if possible.

 

[ocean_jet]

The property is in her name but the court considers it "community property" because he's lived there since april of this year.

Who said it was community property? Him, or did a judge actually say that?


I am speaking from experience here in California, so her situation may be difference. It isn't community property if she owned it prior to marriage.


My ex tried to get my Jeep to be considered community property during my divorce, but since I owned it prior to marriage... it was ultimately considered mine.


For a house, my understanding is that if one party owend the house before marriage, then the only part that would be considered community property is any APPRECIATION since they were married.... and if they haven't been married long, there will be no apprecation.

 

[n1ywb]

The property is in her name but the court considers it "community property" because he's lived there since april of this year.

That sounds like a load of shit, thats barely six months. Is that what his lawyer said? There not married, are they? Was she there first?

 

[AIbandit]

She's owned it for like 10 years and they've been living separately maintaining separate assets since then. They've been married for almost 20 years.

His lawyer said it's community and the judge agreed.

 

[ocean_jet]

She's owned it for like 10 years and they've been living separately maintaining separate assets since then. They've been married for almost 20 years.

His lawyer said it's community and the judge agreed.

Based on that... I would unfortunately agree.


Unless they are legally separated (meaning one party has filed with the courts), everything he ownes that he acquired since marriage is 50% hers, and everything she ownes that she acquired since marriage is 50% his.


Does he own anything worth anything that he's acquired since marriage? If so, it is 50% hers... that includes any bank accounts, cars, houses, ANYTHING of value is legally 50% hers.

 

[n1ywb]

Based on that... I would unfortunately agree.


Unless they are legally separated (meaning one party has filed with the courts), everything he ownes that he acquired since marriage is 50% hers, and everything she ownes that she acquired since marriage is 50% his.


Does he own anything worth anything that he's acquired since marriage? If so, it is 50% hers... that includes any bank accounts, cars, houses, ANYTHING of value is legally 50% hers.

The bad news is I think you're right.

The good news is it's all 50% hers so his BS of transferring all the assets to him shouldn't fly. Anyway I'd say lawyer up, sell your 50%, pay the lawyer, cut your losses, try and sue him for your costs and get him found at fault in the divorce. And still try to get him kicked off the property via a restraining order, it might be 50% his, that doesn't mean he automatically gets to live there.

And again I think binding arbitration would be cheaper than lawyers if he'll agree to it.

 

[n1ywb]

The property is in her name but the court considers it "community property" because he's lived there since april of this year.

She has a restraining order they took "all" of his guns from him but she said she just went to the house and found one with boxes of ammo hidden outside along with a few inside. I told her to call the sheriff to come get them before he comes to get his stuff tomorrow.

It's not that the 3.5k wouldn't be worth it it's just no one has the money. Honestly I think her only hope is if the judge actually listens to what the letters say.

Lawyers offer payment plans. She needs to lawyer up and get her share.

 

[AIbandit]

Based on that... I would unfortunately agree.


Unless they are legally separated (meaning one party has filed with the courts), everything he ownes that he acquired since marriage is 50% hers, and everything she ownes that she acquired since marriage is 50% his.


Does he own anything worth anything that he's acquired since marriage? If so, it is 50% hers... that includes any bank accounts, cars, houses, ANYTHING of value is legally 50% hers.

Thanks, They have been separated but not legally. He has his own house as well.

 

[urban yan]

You're a smart guy; can't you arrange for something heavy to fall on the dude's head... preferably while he's digging a hole in the ground.