rant about Thurston county courts

I cant beleive that the Government lets this stuff go on!!

I have a lifetime restraining order against my ex in Hawaii, SHE made it bad enough that I was actually worried she might do something stupid to me or my family!! She returned and got one against me in Hawaii, this was all 5-6+ years ago. Last year I got sick of buying tickets and her not putting my son on the plane for COURT ORDERED visitation so I file for a new custody hearing in Hawaii and send her a subpenea. She has never complied with court orders to furnish a home address so i know where my son is even though she allways demands to have mine, so I sent it to her POBOX. its all fine and dandy till I have a cop on my doorstep serving me with a subpenea for Thurston county court. She filed for a restraining order because I was trying to take the child out of the state and causing her emotional distress!!!!!!!!!!! Their court date was the day before the custody trial in Hawaii. I do the Thurston county trial by phone, I was never sent any paper work that she used as evidence and I didnt get a chance to speak during the hearing. They told me I was guilty of domestic violence because she was a WITNESS to my assault 3rd misdemeanor charge!!?? then they told me that I had no right to try to kidnap my son and they gave me no chance to say a single word! about it being a subpenea! I was astonished to say the least. the next day Hawaii said I couldnt get costudy because of the restraining order that she got. I now wasnt allowed to speak to my son or anything for 1 year!! I didnt have the money to go to washington and I cant have her served because I dont know her address, they cant use the court records!! that was one year ago so i will be able to see my son again right? I moved to Oregon this month and now I get a call from my Mom in Hawaii, the cops showed up there!! they treid to serve me a warrant because even though I have not called or contacted them in anyway in the whole last year she is still getting a extension!! and the hearing is on the 6th!! So I only get 2 days notice???!!!!! how can I prepare any documents and send them from out of state in 2 days????

6 years ago I went from 4 visits a year, unlimited daily contact and independent contact with my sons teachers and doctors. She would NEVER answer the phone so I took her back to court and she said she couldnt be home all day so i got a 5 minute window to call him at 7PM, she is allways telling him "if you want this treat you'll get off the phone" so i only would get a couple minutes. then she wouldnt put him on the plane even though I was buying the full ticket so I took her back to court. She said she couldnt be expected to make it to the airport 4 times a year so I got my visits knocked down to 3 times a year!!!! She moved so often and wouldnt give me the school or town so I couldnt contact the doctors or teachers so I took her back to court, she stated some crap about being military and what not so now I cant talk to his teachers and doctors. She is a horrible person so I taker her to court to get my son and now I cant even talk to him!!!!!!!

So EVERYTIME I take her to court for doing something wrong I lose my privlidges with my son!!!!!! and now I may never get to see him again? I guess the only thing a child needs from his father is child support?? oh yea, she has opened up 7 of those cases in different counties, I was paying $310 a month to 3 different states!! so i guess $930 is a good amount to pay her after I paid for her college and help her get her degrees only to sit around the house allday and not work so she can get more money from me? And her husband is a warrant officer in military intelligence, so i can see how they must be hurting for money!!

I guess this isnt only a rant about Thurston county courts, its a rant on teh whole "keep the father away from the child because she is a lying tramp" issue

What's your attorney say about all this?

I had some bad deals in court with my daughter. Daughters mom is a crack head that had no job and just did drugs all day untill she became mental. Now my 12 year old still lives with her after 9 court cases and the judge evan told her she was lucky to have her. I have two other daughters that do live with me and I've always paid my child support so im not sure way my 12 year old has to live with this crack head. All that matters is that my daughter is safe and that is not the case. Daughters mom has had the house shot, robbed, and fights in the house. If I had the $$$ for a better lawyer I know thing would be different. Other thing is mom doesn't care what my daughter does so when she comes to my house there is rules and she has to pick up after herself. She does not like this so she just calls mom to come get her. My daughter has no roll modles and I'm scared of her future

Hire a hitman, she can't take you to court if she's 6 feet under.

Unfortunatly my Lawyer had a stroke and isnt able to help.

It gets even better, I just found out that on Aug. 6th last year Thurston county sheriff's put warrant for my arrest for violating the order of protection. Apperantly at 7PM I called hte house as evident by her caller ID, HHMMMM 7PM? you mean teh court ordered time Im llowed to call my son? the order of protection didnt start till Aug. 8th and I didnt even know about it untill Aug. 7th!! So before I knew what she was upto I called on a time the sate of Hawaii told me to call and I get a warrant for my arrest without me ever knowing for a YEAR??
I call them up to turn my self in, I need to do it in washington on tuesdays or thursdays between 10 and 12 oclock!! They wont even pick me up in Oregon I need to go to washington. I cant file a hearing cause I need to turn myself in first!! this is bullshit! I cant work because of the warrant, Im re-enlisting in the military and now they cant take me because if the warrant so I might lose all my re-enlist benifits, gauranteed duty station and even my MOS!!
Thurston county court says if I didnt commited the crime I wouldnt be in this situation!! Oh yeah, because this is "domestic violence" I wont get realesed untill the preliminary trial about a week later!!!!!!!

WTF OVER????

that sucks man!!! sorry. that's why I will never have kids, that and they are expensive!!!

In2Fords, that sounds like a complete and total nightmare. That really sucks for you, you have my sympathies. Hindsight being 20/20 and all, you apparently married/bore a child with a psychopath. Hard to know at the time, especially if you knocked her up early in the relationship.


For all of you young fellers, use a condom and get to know the gal really well before that walk down that aisle. I'm blessed with a great wife (married 17, together 20 years) and I can't imagine that kind of psychotic nonsense just to try and see my child(ren).


I wish you good luck in proceeding onward with this, it sounds like you're way overdue to catch a break.

Thanks guys.

many years ago I was a young Marine that thought I was invinceable, play hard, work hard, dink hard and fight hard. I went on a tour and some incidents really screwd me up. I immediatly thought I needed to grow up and raise a family and be a man, but I was only 20 years old. as soon as I got back to Hawaii I met her, cute blonde, couple years younger and ready to start her life as a military wife. we hooked up and less then 3 months later she was pregenant and moving in with me. what I didnt know was that she was damaged goods, I eventually found out about how abusive her dad was, they would have knock down drag out fights and he would cheat on her mother and was a genuine jerk but her mom was never strong enough to leave him and make her own life so turned to the bottle instead. Her father turned his life around once he got promoted to E7 in the ARMY and started going to school and started being better then everyone else so he could look down at them, especially his drunken wife. My ex Amanda started competing with her dad. she would decorate our house exactly like her parents just to show that we could have what they had but at sooner time in her life. She was really worreid about what others thought, everyone would get a different story. It was rediculous, Im a "dont care what you think, infact I might say things just to erk you" kinda guy while she was the opposite. she started getting more demanding and volotile, she would jump at the chance to start a fight while all I wanted to do was leave when she got like that. She handled the bills and was a stay at home mother while I busted my ass to support us, she would do things like call my boss and demand a advance without me knowing becase she had spent the rent money showing off for her parents. when i would try to leave in the morning she would make a big deal about how I said good bye and start a fight and make me late for work. she would show up at my job site and make a scene. I finally had enough and was packing my things one day, she pulls a knife and holds it to her throte and tells me how she had allready told people in her college classes how I was a abusive person and she was afraid for her life, if I left her she would hurt herself and make me look like the bad guy, I calmed her down and she told me if I ever left her she would make sure my son would never see me again. At this point I was really worreid, she was certifiable!! I stayed, I had seen to many fathers lose custody and not get to see their kids, my son is the most important person in my life. One day while leaving our apartment a man walks up to me and cold cocks me out of the clear blue so i defended myself and he went to the hospital, luckily for me there was cameras and I got the film cause he stated that I attacked him out of the blue!!!! I thought it was weird, a military guy came out of no where and assaults me for no reason and then blames me for hurting him??? I got called into the police station and find out Amanda has made a report saying that she was walking with me when it happened and got angry at her so I beat the crap out of this guy for no reason!! she didnt know about the video yet because I brought it with me to the police station. My buddy is a cop there so we play along with her, he calls her for some minor detail and we find out she is staying the night at my buddies house??!!!! I figured out she was leaving me and to make sure i didnt get custody she set me up. pissed me off so i went to meet with him and he wasnt there. I demolished his house and got into some other trouble. Never once did I hit her or my child but because I fell into her plot and did get in trouble she got custody.
I found out after we broke up by a family member of hers that Amanda was molested by her father as a child and fell in love with him as a teenager and was trying to compete with her mom by making our house nicer and make her dad jelous by being with me. She was so cute and so nice when i met her, once she had her claws in me she let her teeth show. she is a scavenger of the worst kind, she tries to find love to fill her empty heart but there is never enough so whe cant stop. My son has told me how she and her husband Luke would have knock down drag out fights, she's still with him though, she must like it when they punch back.
Be carefull guys, like said, allways use a condom!! I have been with my fiancee for just over 4 years now and we are planning on having kids one day but Im still gun shy to this day. We have NEVER had a fight!! The worst it gets for us is to dissagree but still hold eachother and kiss, never once raised our voices and there will never be any violence in our relationship, I will not stand for it this time.

Can a brutha get a paragraph?

haha

WheelinJR said:

Can a brutha get a paragraph?

haha

Click to expand...

He's the 'victim'.

The end.

Thanx XJ

By the way i love your sig

just 2 weeks ago I got my CCW and started carrying. as I was leaving a house a cop told me I just bought pot and he wanted to see it. I only had 2 things to tell the cop, first thats rediculous, it was the last tenants that dealt pot not these ones and I thought it was stupid he wanted to see some marijauna instead of the 9MM I had under my shirt. I made sure to keep my arms away from my shirt as I said this and the look on his face was priceless. atleast his partner and I laughed after looking my name up:yap:

just got off the phone from the hearing. They are giving me a 2 week extension but refuse to send me any evidence from the first hearing. the first hearing a year ago stated that I was guilty of Domestic violence because she was a witness o my assault charge. They are basing the restraining order and now the extension on that presumption but are refusing to let me see any evidence saying I am guilty of what they say. they refuse to start litigation on the original charge even though the person in charge ( not a judge) is looking at the evidince, the same evidence that I wasnt allowed to see the first time. the fact that they are using the finding of my guilt to domestic violence gives me the right to refute it, even if it means re opening litigation of the case they are trying to get the extension from, especially since I have never been allowed to see any evidence and have been denied discovery!!!!!!
she actually told me I didnt have a chance but was willing to let me have 2 weeks even though it was a inconvenionce!!!!!!!
I WAS NEVER SERVED, THEY ARE LOOKING AT PAPERS I HAVE NEVER SEEN TO JUDGE ME AND GIVE ME NO OPPORTUNITY TO DEFEND MYSELF AND THINK I AM THE ONE BEING A PAIN IN THE BUTT??!!!
I contacted hawaii's attorney general and we are discussing our options.

You know there's more than one lawyer in the world, right? You're not tied to the one who had a stroke. Sounds like you need one yesterday.

Welcome to Washington law. I don't even want to get started so let me just say that I have been, and will continue to go through, the same thing. Minus the phucked up restraining order shit. If you are a man in Washington and actually care about your kids and want to be a part of their life, forget about it. Men have NO rights here. Best of luck man, I feel for ya.

Yeah, theres more then one lawyer, I just cant afford another right now. I got my Lawyers daughter to help me, she is in washington and knows my case fairly well. We got a 2 week extension and are going to argue the restraining order is double jeopardy. I have allready been thru this with Hawaii and they did all the testing to determine I have not been, am not and will not be a hazard to my sons well being and there is no new evedince to try me on it.
Hawaii's attorney general is on my side about this and he can talk to the preciding judge in Hawaii.
During my original custody battle it took 3 days for the judge to hear our arguments and another 2 weeks to make the dicision to give her custody but I got extremely liberal visitation, just shy of having joint custody. The reason he gave her custody was because she would be a stay at home mother and would have more time to "better facilitate visitation for the father" then I would as a single father. After the custody hearing the judge got changed over to civil court and we never got to go back to him on all the occasions we were back in court on her violations. Once he has seen that she has disobeyed every single order he gave and I am about to be marraied to a woman who loves my son very much, he will have a different opinion on her ability to facilitate visitation.

I have woked with Hawaii's Attorney general a yea ago when my ex was having Washington CSEA attack me even though I was paying support thru a court order in Hawaii. The Attoney genral actually went to Washington took legal actions against Washington CSEA due to their actions. Washington CSEA now refuses to take on my ex's case. The Atorney Generals office doesnt take on ciminal cases so they cant help me on the order of protection case but I have sent out a very detailed letter with a list of supporters to 17 politicians, both in Hawaii and in Washington.
We ae hopin to create a precident about out of state restraining orders that allready exist.

Mc2KXJ said:

Welcome to Washington law. I don't even want to get started so let me just say that I have been, and will continue to go through, the same thing. Minus the phucked up restraining order shit. If you are a man in Washington and actually care about your kids and want to be a part of their life, forget about it. Men have NO rights here. Best of luck man, I feel for ya.

Click to expand...

Im sorry to hear that this is so common, I have a number for a lwayer that comes HIGHLY recomended, he is pricey but is worth it. Let me know if you need it.
Jeremy

Damn..

Good luck on your mess.

I emailed a very detailed and polite letter to my congressmen, attorney generals and every justice office I could find in Hawaii, Oregon and Washington. I have some very promising replies from some very high up positions and groups. I will not have any updates for a month or so but even if Washington settles out of court I will be well off

Congrats. I'll hope for the best for you.