Slow down and breathe - it's easier to understand you...
The dipstick tube has a junction a few inches above the bend into the sump pan. This junction is just pushed together and sealed with an o-ring - but it can get difficult over time. If you can, twist the pan a bit back and forth to break the crud loose from there.
Once you have the connection freed up, I find that applying a bit of "red moly" grease to the o-ring helps it come loose the next time. However, since the AW4 filter is little more than a metal strainer screen, you don't need to drop it very often (having the drain plug also helps...) About every third time you change the fluid should do - make sure you clean the magnet well this time, and you just need to clean the filter and check the magnet later (it shouldn't get too "hairy" after you clean it this time, and the filter can be quickly cleaned by removing it, blasting it with carburettor cleaner or brake cleaner from the top, then reinstall. Don't torque the screws very hard, and you'll be able to reuse that cork "gasket" that helps to seal it in place.)