Marriage?

[Mc2KXJ]

I first got married when I was too young at the prime old age of 21 to a drop dead hot Australian blond that I met in Japan. At the end of the day, after a few years had passed, her hotness wasn't enough to keep me enthralled with who she was as a person. Lust and infatuation seemed to pale in comparison to her lack of being human. If that makes sense to you, you get it. I am now remarried to a great, strong women who puts up with me, challenges me, and keeps me in check. (I need that!) She is exactly what I need, but not what I really want. So I pose the following question:
In response to a local thread about marriage, or the opposite, I'm curious...

What is one thing that you wish you could change about your wife (or long term girlfriend) that would make you feel like they are your everything?

and.

What is one thing you think they would say they wish they could change about you?

[Ba-Riedo]

I first got married when I was too young at the prime old age of 21 to a drop dead hot Australian blond that I met in Japan. At the end of the day, after a few years had passed, her hotness wasn't enough to keep me enthralled with who she was as a person. Lust and infatuation seemed to pale in comparison to her lack of being human. If that makes sense to you, you get it. I am now remarried to a great, strong women who puts up with me, challenges me, and keeps me in check. (I need that!) She is exactly what I need, but not what I really want. So I pose the following question:
In response to a local thread about marriage, or the opposite, I'm curious...

What is one thing that you wish you could change about your wife (or long term girlfriend) that would make you feel like they are your everything?

and.

What is one thing you think they would say they wish they could change about you?

Now what would your wife say if she saw this Rich?

-Alex

[Mc2KXJ]

Phuck off Alex. LOLOLOL
That is the point of posting it.
Dick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Cox89XJ]

I'll give it a shot.
Been married going on 38 years.
You have to be strong enough to bend.
What would I change about my wife? I wish she trusted me more.
What would she change about me? Me get a hair transplant. I'm bald!

[Mc2KXJ]

Awesome.
That's the kind of response I was hoping for.
Thanks for the input.

[Ba-Riedo]

Oh so now you dont like my respones? Go roll down a hill.:tear:

-Alex

[Mc2KXJ]

Sorry Alex, this is for straight relationships.

Pray out the gay!!!

[Ba-Riedo]

Sorry Alex, this is for straight relationships.

Pray out the gay!!!

:woohoo:

-Alex

[Gerr]

my wife wants me to be cleaner and have zero female friends
I want my wife to stop over analyzing everything

I first got married when I was too young at the prime old age of 21 to a drop dead hot Australian blond that I met in Japan. At the end of the day, after a few years had passed, her hotness wasn't enough to keep me enthralled with who she was as a person. Lust and infatuation seemed to pale in comparison to her lack of being human. If that makes sense to you, you get it. I am now remarried to a great, strong women who puts up with me, challenges me, and keeps me in check. (I need that!) She is exactly what I need, but not what I really want. So I pose the following question:
In response to a local thread about marriage, or the opposite, I'm curious...

What is one thing that you wish you could change about your wife (or long term girlfriend) that would make you feel like they are your everything?

and.

What is one thing you think they would say they wish they could change about you?

[srimes]

I think the married guys here are to terrified to say what they'd change in their wives. Many are probably too terrified to even allow themselves to think it!

[Boatwrench]

I think the married guys here are to terrified to say what they'd change in their wives. Many are probably too terrified to even allow themselves to think it!


Ding Ding Ding! We Have a Winner!

If I could change one thing about my wife....I would take away her pain. She had an accident where I had to leave her on the trail for 3 hours while I went for help. Her back is always in pain and the mended broken ankle hurts every once in a while. Makes her timid to try things (like off-roading with me in Moab), she wouldn't zip line across the jungle canopy in Belize nor back apck anymore...

but she has put up with my BS for over 28 years.

[Matthew Currie]

Both my wife and I were married before. What I would change if I could would be the crap we had to take first to get where we are now. The rest is trivial.

[Lowrange2]

She needs to loose 40 lbs and learn to trust me. If she even thinks that I talked to a female at all she gets super jeoulous and makes a big deal out of it.

I need to stop snoring.

[jeepboy381]

Well I am not married but I have been with the same girl for over 5 years. If I could change anything about her I would want her to hang out with her girlfriends more often or lack there of. It just seems like if I am working on my Jeep, or hanging out with guy friends she is always waiting around for me instead of doing something on her own.

I think if she could change something about me she would want to change my thoughts on getting married. I am not exactly that fond of it even though I love her and want to stay with her for the rest of my life. Also she would want me to balance out a little better how much I hang out with her as opposed to my hobbies.

But I am very lucky, she does not want to stop me from doing anything I enjoy like Jeeps, wheeling, snowboarding, and all the other stuff I do that she does not do. Sometimes I just get carried away ya know. She has been wanting to get married for years now but I just don't like the thought, my Dad has been married 3 times. People change

[goodburbon]

But I am very lucky, she does not want to stop me from doing anything I enjoy like Jeeps, wheeling, snowboarding, and all the other stuff I do that she does not do. Sometimes I just get carried away ya know. She has been wanting to get married for years now but I just don't like the thought, my Dad has been married 3 times. People change

Good on ya! she'll want to stop you all of the sudden if you marry her. By keeping her a girlfriend you keep her on her toes.

As for me, Mrsgoodburbon is home from work today and has a naxja account, so she's perfect.:)

She wishes I hadn't gone through my first marriage.( I can be a cold sumbitch now)

[TRNDRVR]

I have the most perfect disfunctional marriage you could ask for......

I wouldn't change a thing. :thumbup:

[5-90]

She wants to lose 20-30 pounds, but I don't see why.

I need to lose 10-15 (I'd like to get down to about 240#, it's a comfortable weight for me and I can support it well.)

I'd like to fix both of our knees, my back, and wave my hand over the pain in my neck and face (Fx C5, multiple facial Fx, ...)

Personality? I wouldn't want her to change a damn thing. She might like me being less cynical and pessimistic - but only a little. It's come in handy. We balance each other out (OK, maybe I'd like to be a little less Pollyanna, but only a little. As I said, we balance each other out.) She's smart enough to keep up with me (pass me in some areas,) and strong enough to put me on my arse (physically or mentally) when I need it. I do need it from time to time. She's willing to get dirty, she's willing to fight if need be, she responds well to training and instruction (sometimes, it's like she reads my mind when we're working in tandem,) and she can be "feminine" without "going all female on me."

I've not had any complains with her for the last eleven years, and I don't anticipate any in the next 25-30 or so.

OK - I'll admit. I'd like to take her up a cup size or two. Yes, she knows...[SIZE]

But, for a relationship where there are 17 years between us and everyone told us it wouldn't last six months, we're doing well. And, for all the "mystics and statistics" that said we wouldn't last, I'd like to say this - [SIZE=5]GET BENT!

Any relationship that feels like it can work can work - if you're willing to put work into it. I never said it was always easy (it isn't,) but it can be worth it. I have found my other half.

[rocknxj]

Hey, I've been married for 22 years. We men are supposed to internalize our feelings, don't you know that?

Regardless of how fun that question is, publically asking what you would change about your wife is a sign of internal conceit and harmful pride. Are you sure you don't need to change anything about yourself first before asking a question like that?

What the hell. Let's go wheeling.

[5-90]

Hey, I've been married for 22 years. We men are supposed to internalize our feelings, don't you know that?

Regardless of how fun that question is, publically asking what you would change about your wife is a sign of internal conceit and harmful pride. Are you sure you don't need to change anything about yourself first before asking a question like that?

What the hell. Let's go wheeling.

Hm - isn't that why I listed things she'd probably like to change about me?

As far as she goes, if she's not the "female ideal" for me, she's damned close to it - and I've told her so on a number of occasions.

"Always tell her she is beautiful, even if she is not. Eventually, you'll realise that she really is."

[Spudboy]

If I could change anything about my wife, I'd erase the memory of about 12 years of her childhood/adolescence. For the amount of baggage she carries, she handles it well.

She'd probably want me to lose a few pounds and help more around the house.

We're at 30 years now and it only gets better.

[Goatman]

[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]In response to a local thread about marriage, or the opposite, I'm curious...

What is one thing that you wish you could change about your wife (or long term girlfriend) that would make you feel like they are your everything?

and.

What is one thing you think they would say they wish they could change about you?


I wish she liked wheeling. She wishes I didn't.



After 35 years, it doesn't matter. We have both changed considerably since we married. We have a wonderful life together, and, we each do things we love that the other doesn't.

[Mc2KXJ]

I'm really impressed with the number of you that have been married for so long and are still happy about it.

[bcmaxx]

6yrs in, wish she'd lose whatever she has against my parents, and yes, less 20lb would be cool. she's a good girl though ( hell she just went halfers on some 33 cooper stt's for our anniversary!, she likes big tires I guess)

I think she would like more alone time without my friends around

[Mc2KXJ]

X2 for me, minus the parents thing and the tires.

[racer32]

I took care of that "having a wife" problem almost 2 years ago... its the absolute best descision I have ever made in my life...

To answer your question though, I would have made her not so selfish
I'm perfect so no change needed :)

Thats cool that people can stay married for long periods. My parents are in that group heading on 40 years. What makes me sad is to go to the store and see some poor dude or chick for that matter and their spouse is some dumpy, unattractive, complaining slob and they have a look of desparation on their face. People staying married is cool for the right reasons. Staying married "for the kids" or "because i'm supposed to" is futile and I fully support divorce for people who need it. Since my divorce, I have a way better relationship with my 11 y.o. son, I get to do what I think is right for me, I pay my bills on time, I wheel when I want and believe it or not, my ex and I get along better than we did when we were married. She got remarried after 8 months though... hahaha I laughed when she told me... anyway, my two cents...

[JoesXJ]

I've been married for 5 years this June to Megan.

1. We have a perfect 3 year old little girl.
2. We and own a house.
3. Our, uhhhh...."relationship" is healthy like a bunch on teenagers.
4. My inlaws are freekin awesome and will help us in anyway (not that we need it....well babysitting maybe).

I wouldnt change a thing, if I did, I might not have what I have now.

:woohoo: Plus - we got this for the family for X-mas.....
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y242/joe_boatwright/IMG_0704.jpg

(Those are 37's being stuffed - its got 35's now though)

[RichP]

26 years, second for both of us.
I wish I could take the pain away from that accident down in Orlando we were in a few years ago.
She wants me to stop smoking, I might if I ever find a stable job.
We could both stand to loose 20 llbs... me so I could carry a full sized 45 better inside the wasteband and her because she wants too. Problem is she's too darn good a cook. She worked at a swiss bakery all thru high school and learned. Bakes everything from scratch. Now that she has a ZJ she no longer feels like an outcast in the family however on the downside I noticed her going through the new 2008 quadratec catalog the other nite, she's never opened on in over 10 years till now.
Looking forward to our 50th...

[Lowrange2]

She needs to loose 40 lbs and learn to trust me. If she even thinks that I talked to a female at all she gets super jeoulous and makes a big deal out of it.

I need to stop snoring.

After speaking to our wise group of frequent chatters I have come to realize that I'm quite picky and shallow. I still feel like she needs to lose 20 lbs (I exagerated on the 40 lbs), and she agrees, but I don't want you guys/gals thinking that I'm dating a 'walrus' even though I have previously stated that I am. :) lol... I'm digging a hole aren't I?

She is quite beautiful, isn't she? I do love her mucho mucho!

http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c284/lowrange2/936831607_l.jpg

[8Mud]

The wife and I have been married for thirty years. We share very few common interests and are two distinctly different types. We compliment each other, her weaknesses are my pluses and vice versa.
I figured out a long time ago, playing musical women is a waste of time. Everybody has a list of pluses and minuses, you swap women and you just change one set of problems for another.
If you asked her, she would probably want to change just about everything about me, but she knows in her heart we are partners for life.

[5-90]

If I could change anything about my wife, I'd erase the memory of about 12 years of her childhood/adolescence. For the amount of baggage she carries, she handles it well.

She'd probably want me to lose a few pounds and help more around the house.

We're at 30 years now and it only gets better.

Being a house-husband at the moment, I do plenty around the house. Clean it, fix it, ...

She doesn't want me to lose weight, but I think it's not a bad idea. I don't want her to lose weight, but she wants to.

I'd like to get her mother out of what's left of my hair, tho... Eight years is bloody enough!

[Shorty]

been together seven years (short-timers) and married about half of them. I have only one wish and it's only for the sake of my beautiful bride and our daughter. I would love for somebody to come up with a foolproof cure for bi-polar disorder (manic-depression for us old schoolers) and give my wife back the 8 months each year that she looses to her internal deamons. I'm strong and can cope with the "down time" but I would love to see my wife enjoy an entire four seasons in a row without the need for mind-numbing medication.

As for the "what would she change about me" question-- depending on her mood, damn near everything is possible. During the low times, I have come to understand that everything is my fault and no amount of effort to change will alter that, but during the high times I am Superman and nothing can change that either.

All in all, I love her to death (literaly sometimes) and I try to make her understand, the highs definitely offset the lows for me-- it's her health I would want changed.

[Spudboy]

After speaking to our wise group of frequent chatters I have come to realize that I'm quite picky and shallow. I still feel like she needs to lose 20 lbs (I exagerated on the 40 lbs), and she agrees, but I don't want you guys/gals thinking that I'm dating a 'walrus' even though I have previously stated that I am. :) lol... I'm digging a hole aren't I?

She is quite beautiful, isn't she? I do love her mucho mucho!

http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c284/lowrange2/936831607_l.jpg


If she has 20 to lose, she hides it well. :greensmok Stop digging.

[Gerr]

If she has 20 to lose, she hides it well. :greensmok Stop digging.
X2 where would she loose 20# from?

[Darky]

What I change about her? Confidence. She has very little confidence in herself, even though she's beautiful, talented, a good cook, and plays/sings/writes her own songs on guitar. She gets jealous of me if I even work with an attractive woman because she sees herself poorly. Also, her health. We're shooting 50/50 on pregnancies vs healthy children. 4 pregnancies, 2 kids. She always takes it hard like its her fault or something.
What would she change about me? lose some weight, she says she still likes the way I look (I know I'm fat, 6'1" 250 lbs with a 40-42" waist...) but she fears more for my health than appearance. I fear for both :D. And maybe be a self-made millionaire without having to work so I never have to leave her to go to work. :D I wouldn't mind that one myself.

We just had our 4 yr anniversary yesterday- 3/20/08 -and still in love, even more so than when we first fell in love. I've been around a lot of girls, had a lot of female friends in HS nothing more :), and they all have issues. Like people here have said, trading one for another is trading one group of problems for another. Its not like we guys are so perfect. We've each got our own set of issues for the woman to deal with. Its the differences that knit us together. Just as an example, we're both Christian and in our spritual lives, she's strong on knowledge (being a pastor's daughter will do that) whereas I'm strong on faith. I know God will provide, she can tell you where in the Bible it tells you. We've both been growing together, my weaknesses are gettin stronger as they mesh with her strengths and vice versa. Those who say they love thir girlfriend and want to be together forever but don't want to get married, its fear. You said your dad has been through a couple marriages, but if you step into a marriage for the wrong reasons its hard to stay together. If you truly are in love and its still strong today like the day you first got together, marry her. There will be problems, me and Jolene have had plenty, but its your love that pulls you through. Love is a decision, if you base it on feelings, than when you get into an argument and the feelings aren't there, the love is gone too. If you decide that you love this woman and even through disagreements, fights, tough times, etc you will still love her, nothing will come between you. Many marriages start with the idea that if things get rough I'm out. Commit yourself to the woman for life and work through struggles.

[Lowrange2]

X2 where would she loose 20# from?

That's before the 20#

[goodburbon]

That's before the 20#

She's still hot I bet.

[Lowrange2]

She is. Like I said. I'm just picky, Mr. Boney elbow in the eye guy. :)

[Mc2KXJ]

She's hot and I totally stopped myself before I posted what I wanted to do to her. Because that would have just been wrong and rude. And I'm not like that.:gag:

[5-90]

She's hot and I totally stopped myself before I posted what I wanted to do to her. Because that would have just been wrong and rude. And I'm not like that.:gag:

Suuuuuure, you're not...:bs:

Really tho - unless she put all 20# in her navel (she doesn't look like she has that body type,) she's probably hot as all get out.

My wife is one of those people who ends up putting weight evenly distributed - and I've always seen physical beauty as a matter of proportion. I know what she weighs - and I'm not tellin! - but I don't have any trouble at all with it. As I said, she's losing weight because she wants to, not because I think she should. An important semantic distinction (I've got a bit of a "reserve tank" myself - I want to lose it for me, not for her. I'd like to get back down to a 35-36" waist, I'm about 37-1/2" right now. Still not bad for being over 250#...)

@lowrange - got a current pic? I'd like to see if I'm right (although I'm usually a good judge of body type - it's come in handy...)

[TRNDRVR]

I'm really impressed with the number of you that have been married for so long and are still happy about it. Just for your curiosity........

Met my wife in 1978.
Been with my wife since 1979.
Lived with my wife since 1983.
Married my wife in 1997......

I'm only 45. We have a 5 year old and a 7 year old.

I love my high school sweetheart!!!!!!

[Lowrange2]

@lowrange - got a current pic?

Not that I want to post... :) Might PM ya...

[Mc2KXJ]

Don't hold out on the guy with the small balls.

[Lowrange2]

...

[Mc2KXJ]

lol... we'll see!

And by "we'll see" you mean you and me will see?


LOL

[Darky]

And by "we'll see" you mean you and me will see?


LOL
you guys are gonna check out your small balls??



:D

[Mc2KXJ]

You know, for lumps.

[yardape]

I took care of that "having a wife" problem almost 2 years ago... its the absolute best descision I have ever made in my life...

To answer your question though, I would have made her not so selfish
I'm perfect so no change needed :)

Thats cool that people can stay married for long periods. My parents are in that group heading on 40 years. What makes me sad is to go to the store and see some poor dude or chick for that matter and their spouse is some dumpy, unattractive, complaining slob and they have a look of desparation on their face. People staying married is cool for the right reasons. Staying married "for the kids" or "because i'm supposed to" is futile and I fully support divorce for people who need it. Since my divorce, I have a way better relationship with my 11 y.o. son, I get to do what I think is right for me, I pay my bills on time, I wheel when I want and believe it or not, my ex and I get along better than we did when we were married. She got remarried after 8 months though... hahaha I laughed when she told me... anyway, my two cents...

The above dittos my sentiments precisely. I have a much healthier relationship with my son than I would have if I had stayed married. I remain a responsible father and no longer have to feel like I'm living in a marital prison with no way out.