Well...
1) The earlier XJ's are a little underbraked, and the D35 (reportedly) is borderline for anything 33" and up. You will probably want to install a late vacuum booster (dual diaphragm, vice single - applies brakes faster) and consider going to a Dana44, Ford 8.8", or Ford 9" rear axle.
2) Dunno. Haven't lifted any of my XJ's yet - and probably won't get to lift my 88 for another year or so (got a restomod to finish first...)
3) I've used Borla on quite a number of vehicles, and I favour it. There are also good reports out on Banks, and I think there are a couple other headers out there.
WARNING - check your engine bay to see if you have an EGR valve! The 1990MY was the transition from RENIX to HO - so the late 90's have ended up with HO engines. The HO can be readily distinguished by the lack of the EGR valve. If you have a RENIX engine, you will need a header with the EGR port, in addition to the HEGO sensor bung.
While you're changing the header, I'd like to suggest you get some bronze bolts for the header, brass nuts for the collector, and some brass allthread to make new studs for the ends and centre - everything's threaded 3/8"-16. Also make sure you have a set of Belleville spring washers (you can get a box of them from MSC Direct if you can't find them locally -
www.mscdirect.com.) to replace any that are missing - or just replace the old ones - since they spread out the clamp load and make life for the bolts a little easier. I have also found that a thin layer of RTV Copper (and
nothing else!) goes well on the gasket.
Last, use LocTite 272 on the bolts, if you use anything at all. They'll work loose enough on their own - so you don't want to use Never-Seez. #272 is the only LocTite that will hold up to exhaust heat - that's what it was designed for - and it works well.
Reasons - I suggest brass because it won't gall or sieze on the steel/iron surfaces or in the holes, so it will be easier to deal with them the next time. You're also less likely to break something with proper planning.
The RTV Copper adds a little "forgiveness" to the gasket - which is needed later, when things get used. It's a known problem with inline sixes that the manifold gaskets - especially exhaust or combination manifold gaskets - tend to lose their seal over time unless you watch over them. This isn't a design flaw - just a materials issue and there isn't much that can be done about it. I also check torque on my manifolds once a year (part of a regular inspection) - while I'm checking other things. I don't usually find many loose bolts, but it's enough that I'm glad I check. (I'm picky on maintenance - just ask my wife!)
Anything else?
5-90