"ARE YOU F*%&ING KIDDING ME!!!"

[Mr.Shrek]

So this morning has started off in a more then desired manor! Fist I'm woken up by Elvis (my boxer) a half hour early. Which tells me 2 things: I'm not going to get anymore sleep and he must have broken out of his crate again. I proceed to get up and my first step is into a luke warm puddle of piss. Expletive, expletive, go grab towel to clean it up. Brush my teeth, shave, and cut myself. Go to get my cloths from the freshly delivered laundry basket....what do I find.....freshly delivered piss all over my clean clothes. Find different clothes to wear, get dressed, grab my stuff to leave, and can't find my cell phone. Gee I must have left it in the car. Kiss the wife goodbye, go out to the car, sit down and no cell phone. But wait what is that awful smell....smells like crap....check shoes...nothing. Get out of the car to go look for the phone and two brown streaks catch my eye on the back of my seat. Upon further inspection my wife's dog must have drug her fury ass across my belt. Which after putting it on I got it on my pants, shirt, and car. EXPLEVIE EXPLETIVE MFer EXPLITIVE Now late to work, I go inside, change clothes, find my phone, throw a work jacket over my car seat, and proceed of to my job. Now I'm enjoying a flat coke and dealing with the daily pissing (as if I haven’t dealt with enough piss today) and moaning of "It's to hot in here" "It's to cold" "I don't like this monitor stand, can you find me a new one?" "Did you go by the post office yet? Then why isn't my letter here?"
:smsoap:hasta:flamemad::gonnablow
So how's your day going?

[nobutada55]

hmmm I have at least one day like that a week. I know how you feel.

[PacificEd]

Sorry it started out so rough. I promise I didn't laugh at all and feel awful about your experience.

[bigalpha]

LOLOL. My girl and I had a dog and he was a holy terror. The final straw was when he pissed in my shoes. He got taken to the pound shortly after.

My week has been stupid busy.

[RTicUL8]

I'll file this one under "Why not to get an indoor dog."

.


btw, my day's going great!
Thanks for asking. :D

[~Spanky~]

I am so sorry for your.....no wait....I am LoL right now. As I am sure you would if I was in your shoes.
Hey! I did not tell a lie!! ED!
:conceited
http://www.suicidedream.com/Images/thumbs/Sarcastic_Graphics.gif

[Mr.Shrek]

I figured y'all would at least get a good laugh out of it. I'm sure as the day goes by I will too.

[stevend510]

The only way to look at it is your day can't possible get much worse.

[Joshooha]

sounds like a bad sitcom

[stumpXJ]

My wifes uncle died last night, so I get to fly to New Jersey in the morning for a wake and funeral. Oh joy.

My Vet told me yesterday that my Chocolate Lab "Brody" needs to have a $3,000.00 surgery that will render her deaf in both ears to fix an infection that was improperly diagnosed while we were in Germany.

Yay!

I feel for ya man, but what are you gonna do???????????

~James

[YJ-GENRAL]

lol that is funny, and i surely wouldnt want to be in your pants. i mean shoes... hehe.

although my day has been a horrid one as well... not that i have a dog or anything like that but my job has been a real b**** today. pissin and moaning all around, and my work load isnt getting any smaller as i bust my ass to keep up...

[Mr.Shrek]

Man, I'm sorry to hear for your family's loss. Hope your journey to and from NJ is a safe one.

[The Box]

LOLOLOL, Sorry about the day but that right there is funny. Like the piss on the clean cloths wasn't bad enough. The Sh@t smeared belt getting smeared on everything possible :roflmao:I was waiting for you to say you found your phone being used as a new chew toy. Reminds me of Turner And Hooch.

[Mr.Shrek]

"I BROUGHT YOU A MUFFIN HOOCH, TAKE THE MUFFIN HOOCH!!!!" Great movie.

[bigalpha]

There sure has been quite a bit of bad luck regarding pets the past few months. At least the dog didn't jump up in the bed and pee in your face.

[Spawn 93]

No pet problems for me, just a cold.
For the past few days it has been nothing but cough, wheeze, sniffle, snort, blow............. repeat:hang:

[trail rate this]

Man that sucks. Those days happen to the best of us. A week ago monday I got stung 3 times in the ankle by a wasp in my pants, while I was putting them on. I constantly finding things that my bulldog has chewed up, and my cat wont piss in the litter box anymore, so she pisses on the kitchen counter, clothes, and anything else she can find. The outside cats piss and crap in my garage.

Best yet my wife wont get get rid of any of the animals. I've thought the only way to get away from the animals is to get away from the house, wife, and everthing there.

[Stallacrew]

.......snort blow............. repeat...........



Sure sounds more like a personal problem than a cold.

:D:D:D:D:D <------- that means I'm joking

[bigalpha]

:D:D:D:D:D <------- that means I'm joking

No it doesn't.

[High2by]

:roflmao:I needed this today. Thanks guys.







Stump, sorry man.

[Mr.Shrek]

Man that sucks. Those days happen to the best of us. A week ago monday I got stung 3 times in the ankle by a wasp in my pants, while I was putting them on. First time you've had that big of a prick in your pants eh?

I constantly finding things that my bulldog has chewed up, and my cat wont piss in the litter box anymore, so she pisses on the kitchen counter, clothes, and anything else she can find. The outside cats piss and crap in my garage. I'll give your the same tip you give me when dealing with Fiona's dog "Target Practice"

Best yet my wife wont get get rid of any of the animals. I've thought the only way to get away from the animals is to get away from the house, wife, and everthing there. Won't work, they will find you!

[trail rate this]

Yeh that was a first for me and hopefully a last.

[Spawn 93]

Sure sounds more like a personal problem than a cold.

:D:D:D:D:D <------- that means I'm joking



"sneezes" yeah, I think I got the gonacyphahepalaids.......:passgas:

[Team Willys]

Dang, I hate those kind of days, only mine seem to run in week spans.

[JeepAddict85]

At least the dog didn't jump up in the bed and pee in your face.

the dog's saving that for tomorrow morning :D

[postalxj]

I like this part the best!!!!




wife's dog must have drug her fury ass across my belt

[The Box]

Maybe it should say "wife's dog must have drug her ass of fury across my belt"

[Shorty]

If it makes anyone feel any better, I got an eye full of oven cleaner yesterday cleaning the undercarriage of the new Jeep. That shtuff ain't too good for the ol' oculars! I'm trying to pretend I'm not as stupid as I feel right now, so don't laugh too much:nono:

[SCupstateXJ]

I got one for you. I came home from work this afternoon and started replacing the rear hatch struts. I had the old ones off and was holding the hatch open with my head while I was trying to get the *%#& clips in. My head was on the glass one minute and the next the hatch was sitting around my waist and the glass was still sitting on my head. :shocked:

2 hours and A LOT of bad words later I got the glass reseated. The wife was no help, she was too busy laughing at me...

[xjtrailrider]

Now that story reminds me of why I do not have a dog or any other pet. Don't get me wrong, I love dogs but I declared when I had kids and had to clean up their messes that I would not clean up chit or piss after anything that wont do the same for me some day when I get too old to wipe my own @ss or make it to the pot.

I remind my kids often of the messes they made before they were house broken and I do so in a way to make them feel very guilty.